When should I end a friendship when a friend says he knows God but continues to live an ungodly life?

December 30th 2015 | 39189 views 

This is a continuous struggle for the Christian. Jesus knew our position and prayed for us. “I pray not that you should take them out of the world, but that you should keep them from the evil. They are not of the world, even as I am not of the world.” (John 17:15, 16)

Those around us can influence us.  “Do not be tricked by false words: evil company does damage to good behavior.” (1 Corinthians 15:33) Those who train wild horses keep the wild horses separate from the trained as they would undo all the discipline in the trained horse. They would pick up bad habits.

You may feel your friend is an influence on you for the wrong things or you have less and less in common or you would rather be doing something else. A Christian needs to follow his conscience and say, “no” when appropriate. It may be that over time you will naturally go your separate ways.  Or it may be that your friend is a weak Christian and doesn’t realize how different a Christian should be from the world. It’s much more than staying away from outright evil. You may need to kindly and gently talk to him in a helpful way, “The wounds of a friend are given in good faith,” Proverbs 27:6. It’s not him you don’t appreciate but his behavior.

Pray about these matters and the Lord will give you direction. He will either open opportunities to talk or he will give you new experiences directing you away from your friend. Proverbs 3:5-7 “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths. Be not wise in thine own eyes: fear the LORD, and depart from evil.”

Your friend may not understand how you feel.  He may feel condemned. Some things can’t be helped even when done in the best and kindest way possible. “they think it strange that you run not with them to the same excess… speaking evil of you.” 1 Peter 4:4. There’s no need to harshly cut off all communication and make any renewal of friendship impossible.  Hope for the best. Over time they may change and appreciate a friend like yourself.

May these words be a comfort to you as you try to do the right thing. Psalms 24:3-5 “Who may go up into the hill of the Lord? and who may come into his holy place?  He who has clean hands and a true heart; whose desire has not gone out to foolish things, who has not taken a false oath. He will have blessing from the Lord, and righteousness from the God of his salvation. “

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